The Unspoken

Man in black in Vienna

2008-09-29T21:06:00.002+08:00

Honeymoon dance in Vienna Woods

2008-09-29T21:01:00.001+08:00

God is God - Steven Curtis Chapman performing in White House

2008-06-07T13:20:00.000+08:00

Team Hoyt

2008-06-07T12:59:00.000+08:00

2008-06-07T11:51:00.001+08:00

Cat's in the cradle

2007-05-02T12:45:00.000+08:00

I used to think that I don't like ROCK music, because the music appeared to be too loud, and too overpowering.

But little did I know that I have grown to love this genre. Not entirely because of the music, although admittedly some of them are of my taste, but mainly due to the philosophy behind it, the reason of its existence.

According to my darling, who grew up together with rock, most rock singers address social issues, and they have loads of views on how things should be done, their dissatisfaction with the government, with the discrimination, the system of the world, and hence they vent it all out with their kind of music, angry and overwhelming.... the music may not be soothing to the ears, but there's sure a message behind it.

Take, for example, the song made famous by Ugly Kid Joe, Cat's In The Cradle, talks about how a father who has neglected his son when he was young, and how the son has becoming just like him in his later years, and how he has regretted it. Even though he exhausted all means to make up the losses then, he has lost the bond with his son and not surprisingly, the son has been occupied with other priorities, thus not spending enough time with his dad, sad, but this is the pattern of this modern world, man always realize it after it's too late to make amends.

There's a great deal of sadness which may translate to anger by just listening to the song, and those people who pay attention to the lyrics may be affected emotionally, but the song sure means good, and no wonder it was made one of the US education materials, and is still used widely in our rich culture even today.

The lyrics and MTV are embedded below, for your appreciation.

My child arrived just the other day
Came to the world in the usual way
But there were planes to catch and bills to pay
He learned to walk while I was away
He was talking 'fore I knew it
And as he grew he said,
I'm gonna be like you, dad,
You know I'm gonna be like you.

Chorus
And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon,
Little boy blue and the man on the moon.
when you comin' home?
son, I don't know when. we'll get together then.
You know we'll have a good time then.

Well, my son turned ten just the other day.
He said, thanks for the ball, dad. come on, lets play.
Could you teach me to throw?
I said, not today. I got a lot to do.
He said, that's okay. and he walked away and he smiled and he said,
you know, I'm gonna be like him, yeah.
You know I'm gonna be like him.

Chorus

Well, he came from college just the other day,
So much like a man I just had to say,
I'm proud of you. could you sit for a while?
He shook his head and he said with a smile,
what I'd really like, dad, is to borrow the car keys.
See you later. can I have them please ?

Chorus

I've long since retired, my son's moved away.
I called him up just the other day.
I'd like to see you, if you don't mind.
He said, I'd love to, dad, if I could find the time.
You see my new jobs a hassle and the kids have the flu,
But it's sure nice talkin' to you, dad.
It's been sure nice talkin' to you.
And as I hung up the phone it occurred to me,
He'd grown up just like me.
My boy was just like me.

Chorus

John Legend - Ordinary People

2007-04-24T17:31:00.000+08:00

Check this out... Love this too.. .. Eerr r the subtitle is a lil disturbing, but still, it's beautiful =)

Dedicated to my darling - A Design For Life

2007-04-24T16:27:00.000+08:00

Voila!

One of my darling's favourite song....

This post is especially dedicated to you my dear :)

What Kind Of Coffee Are You?

2007-04-24T10:12:00.000+08:00

You Are an Espresso

At your best, you are: straight shooting, ambitious, and energetic

At your worst, you are: anxious and high strung

You drink coffee when: anytime you're not sleeping

Your caffeine addiction level: high

What Kind of Coffee Are You?

J Lo - Que Hiciste

2007-04-23T23:51:00.000+08:00

Love this video!

ETS

2007-04-23T16:08:00.000+08:00

I have had this Hyperhidrosis problem since young and it affects my life.

Have tried copiously plentiful treatment like antiperspirant, traditional medicine, treatment call Iontophoresis to oral medicine that supposed to release / suppress stress level, but all to no avail.

Few years ago came across an article that talks about the permanent solution of this condition, but there's a risk and side effect. Due to lack of support and confidence, I didn't go for it.

However, I guess I will forever be wondering as to how I will feel if I am cured if I never go for it. And though there were some known complication / side effects of it, considering my current condition (which gets worse as time goes by) I have chosen to book the surgeon's time and get the heck of it by going through the surgery call ETS (Endoscopic Thoracic Sympathectomy).

Now I am resting at home as the breathing is painful (the lung was inflated during the surgery to make it easy to cut off the nerve) and I have yet to discover the full leg of the side effects, but as all have told me, there's NO turning back, and that even if it become worse, I know that I have support and I will bear the consequences of this decision I have made...

Aiyo.... no lar not so sad la.. in fact I am very happy lar.. If you know me more than a hi-bye friend, you would know that on the days that I don't sweat, I will feel extremely HYPER and bubbly. And this is exactly how I feel =)

I guess I will be addicted to this emotion from now on... Ouch... laugh too much untill the wound pain a bit... control ... eh hemmm

So this is a new me... My palm will no longer sweat, and I could hold babies better, carry things without worrying if they will fall since my hands are no longer slippery, drive with dry hands hence better control (lol), hold my bf's hand without having to wipe off the irritated sweats once in a while, handle electrical appliances without having the fear of having electrical shock ...

OK, more to come.... Ciao for now.

New Year

2007-02-18T18:54:00.000+08:00

Here's wishing all of you a very porksperity new year!

Cheers to the new year, the new beginning, new hope and new joy

Your only one and only, the one and the only Sze Wui...

stuff.....Whatever la

2007-01-05T19:42:00.000+08:00

I am back.. Not that I have a lot of time doing this blogging, but at least:

1. I have a new Note Book, complete with 3G card and all, so can go on-line anywhere anytime (provided the area is covered by 3G services)

2. Can la.. time management la.. just half an hour won't kill

3. I want to blog

so Voila!

You see life is a very funny thing. When we are all serious and purposeful, we lose out on our time to relax and play. When we are relaxing and joking, we find outselves not progressing in life.

This is what we called opportunity cost in whatever decision that we make.

Therefore we ought to be responsible for whatever path that we choose, just that certain people learn it earlier in life, certain may only realise it at a very regretful days.

A friend used to tell me that most man experiences mid life crisis as at their age, the not-so-old-but-not-exactly-young age, because suddenly it dawn on them that they have pursued things diligently at their teens, that they have suffered great loss in abiding to their believes, and thus building that whatever that they strongly feel about then , but only realise that they have chosen the wrong things at that funny mid life age.

So they suffer, not knowing how to progress. Whether continue in the road they have chosen since they started realising they have hair beneath their nose, or to stop and hop on to a new road, which may cost them to answer life or death questions.

And though we have our papa mama, grand ma grand pa, some great great Noble price winners and gurus to teach us things about life, most of us choose to ignore and tell us things like : "They are not as urbanised as we are now"; "they are but a bunch of moron"; "they are not as smart as me"; "the heck with their philosophy, I live the life I want to live" and so we do things exactly the way we want to do, no wonders we only use about 2% of our brain.

So life is a funny journey, either we tend to worry and worry, not knowing if the decision we make will benefit us in a long run, and jeopordise our current life, or we tend not to worry at all, that when we are old and useless and are sent to old folk's home, we start worrying if anyone at all will take care of us before we kick the bucket.

I am much of the former, and most of my friends say that I am a Bree Van De Kamp in making..

Hah!

Anyway, will retire soon... got stuff to do before I regret not doing today.

See ya =)

SWIM

2006-08-05T12:25:00.000+08:00

Went for the normal swimming regime this morning, but wasn't very happy with it.

First, because I wanted to finish the swim before 1120 so I won't be tanned by our Mr. Sun, and since I was already late for the swim (all because of lazy punya pasal), I quickly dipped in the water and rush to wanting to finish my 20 laps. So, I ran outta breath even before finishing the first lap. Tried catching it in between swim, you know, when the head is up, and before it goes down to move the body forward, but because I have totally lost the rhythm, I panicked, and it got worse, thus to swim from lane 3 back to lane 1 to hold on to the side of the swimming pool, seemed like a hard task for me. But thank God, I finally got a hold on it and rested for about 5 minutes before I continue swimming.

I suppose this is one of the few moments I found myself vulnerable in the water, normally I just love being inside the cool calming bluish smooth liquid. Yeah, and the feeling is not good, is like I am suppose to be 'good' (by my own standard la of course), but now almost drowned, and almost suffocated without O2 in my lungs because of human's inability to get oxygen under the water, unlike fish. Ah well, lesson learnt. Never to rush into something that I have no confidence of.

Second, some kids splish splashed too much, that I the not so bright swimmer ter-swallowed some chlorinated-saltish pool water, and I cough and cough.. For that matter, I lost my rhythm, too. And I have to swim back to my comfortable lower side of the pool, and again, it seemed like a tall order for me. **pant pant** ** gasp gasp** **wheeze wheeze**.. And FINALLY! I was there, thanking God that I was not drowned, for the second time. And that was not even before I finished the second lap! Iisshh iisshh!!

So this time I rested like 10 minutes, adjusting my goggles, clear my vision a lil before gathering all my faith to swim again in the giant 50 X 20 m pool. Then I continue, after swallowed my saliva down the lung to gain confidence, again :-p

Then, because it was already like 1030 hour, many people started to jam the pool. And I had to avoid them. I saw that lane 6, 7 were quite clear, but decided not to swim there as the sun was already shining brightly there. So I continue swimming in my lane 2, and 3, sometimes in between, to avoid the people. So it was tiring, for the fact that there was fear, there were kids who don't read the 5 pages thick swimming etiquette guide, and there were flocks of people densed up the pool, against this small lil poor soul who apparently didn't read the 5 pages thick guide too; so I decided to call it a day la before 1120, though the goal of 20 laps was not achieved.

And before I push myself for the last few laps, the goggles went blurred. I guess it's time for me to change a new one. But because I didn't want to disturb my continuous swimming regime, didn't bother to swim to the side to adjust it. But because I couldn't see clearly, the panic button was on.. and I chocked again, yeah AGAIN. Can you believe this?? I was so disappointed too!!

But well, I find it quite amusing though.. he he he.. swam for 12 or 13 laps only this morning, like 60% of my standard. Will definitely swim again next week, that is if I don't have to go back to work Hhmmm...

That's my swimming activity this morn.. With Murphy's law ;-]

Disappointment

2006-08-04T23:50:00.000+08:00

If only I could focus more on the positive stuff... But it's pressing hard on my chest.. have to let it out.

I guess disappointment only happens when one has hope.. high hope. And when the hope come tumbling down, there the disappointment seeps in. But one cannot NOT have hope too, otherwise everyday will be dam gloomy and miserably dark.. But then again if one is not careful, and have wishful thoughts of having rosy life with beautifully painted sky, the disappointment is going to hit one hard.

At current, my life which consist of work, colleagues, friends, family, challenges dadada is overwhelmed with disappointment. And I am pretty fed up of having self pity again and again.. Just want to pick the pieces up and put them all together and mix them all up and put them in a wonder machine and make them into a big piece again. Though the colour may differ from the original, yet it's in one full piece.

I guess I have always been wanting a life full of wonderful beautiful stuff, sometimes when problems come knocking hard in, instead of fighting, I go ignoring them. And when all issues superimposing on me, I then realise that I need to do something to overcome the overpowering negativity, and by that time it's already too late, and my emotion is already at the unsound stage, and I need support and I need guidance, and I need friends and I need God and I need motivation to pull myself up, again.

And the current situation I am in, I need support.

Work, Friend, Colleague, Family... I am small, in the middle of the circle of all the issues, overshadowed.

Where are you God? What do you want me to do? I know you will not let me down. But my vision of the road ahead is blurring.. You will never leave me, I know. You are just whispering in my ear right now.. But I need something tangible, Oh God.

Hong Kong Trip Photos (Clik here to view all)

2006-08-04T23:14:00.000+08:00

Da Very-long-awaited-HK-Photo Coat (DVC)

Saja nak sama-sama dengan Da Vinci Code

Enjoy =)

I am back

2006-07-22T18:38:00.000+08:00

Have been missing for few days! Man this blogging is really very addictive, only few days of not updating already my hands are itching.. So voila! Am updating again ;) Well what happened these few days:

1. Work. Very hectic. I have 1001 things to do, and the list is growing. GROWING.. GROWING... And I am feeling a lil overwhelmed at the moment, wish that I have an assistant to look at my production stuff when I am away for meeting, or when I am doing the production work, he/she can help do the planning, or when I am away for meeting / training, he / she can report to my boss the unfinished complaints and update him on the daily production issues etc.. But the truth is I ain't gonna get an assistant. "Cause it's all your work" my boss told me.. Ah well, it's just now that the work is piling up a bit, cause there's been changes and we have not adapted to the change yet, and because of the change, we have to do some patching up to undo some damage.. Oh did I say we? No I man I.. I have to do some work to undo the damage.. Aaiii.. Stress betul

2. Out. Have been going out with the SCB friends.. Oh now the group has an additional member, from the president Budak Gile, to Karynn Tan, then myself.. now even Fiona!!! :) We went out for nice dinner on Tuesday, and went back quite late.. The fact that we gals talk and talk and talk, no doubt that the few hours went past like a blink of an eye :)

Budak Gile a.k.a Joyce

Karynn

Fiona

3. Staying out. Spent 2 nights at Budak Gile's place. And since till now I am still vehicle-less, and work is weighing me down, Budak gile had to wait for me to call off my work before coming to fetch me. And we had dinner, and chit chat, and bla bla bla, so for the 2 night I was there, I slept at 2 a.m. and 1 a.m. respectively :p

4. Stress. Recently I had problem with the staff, they sort of boycott their work .. It's a long story, and it's weighing me down, and creating some production / morale problem.. And I am praying to God that this will end soon.. Anyway, have a few to do stuff to counter some complaints, and it's work.. Again!

5. Break down. One of my staff breakdown this week. Because of managing staff issue. I, on the other hand, was at the verge, too. But thankfully, I have some supportive friends and colleagues, so am still healthy and going..

6. Leave. Boss didn't approve my intended leave last week. "Cause you have some pending items unresolved, yet" he said. So I work and work. But I know I have to take some leave in August, need to renew my passport. Still hoping that I could go to Cambodia in September..

7. Sick. Was down with sore throat and almost-flu. Till now my throat is still not completely healed yet, currently my voice is coarse, so don't mistaken me as some transsexual who have their vocal chord remained.

8. Photo page. Just got a CD full of my Hong Kong trip's photos. I mean our HK trip photos, you know, all the 3 of us, not just the perasan me only punya photos in Friendster page :) Well, I still have difficulty uploading all in the photo page, but once it is done, will show all.. Till now, just chill ..

9. Swimming. After not swimming for 2 consecutive weeks, I went back to swim again, though alone, as all my friends couldn't make it, I told myself to go no matter what, since swimming is the ONLY exercise I do nowadays. Some more my doctor told me to do regular exercise to kill off my excessive adrenaline all, so have to la.. Today I only swim for 20 laps, from 9.50 till 11.20 a.m. The pool was jammed with human beings, so couldn't really concentrate (excuse excuse), otherwise I would have swam for 40 laps hehe.

10. Saturday work. Since Feb the banking industry had stopped the Saturday working day policy, I have not been working on Saturday, but today I went back for work, just to psychologically console myself that I have some work loaded off my shoulder by doing so.. So there! After the swim I went back to work, and now updating this blog.. very hectic eh?!

That's all for now, have been quite busy, but still I find time for blogging ;-) Can't help it. Very addictive.

Ciao for now.. but will be back, soon....

Anna Nalick - Breathe (2am)

2006-07-15T18:23:00.000+08:00

2 AM and she calls me 'cause I'm still awake,
"Can you help me unravel my latest mistake?,
I don't love him. Winter just wasn't my season"
Yeah we walk through the doors, so accusing their eyes
Like they have any right at all to criticize,
Hypocrites. You're all here for the very same reason

'Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button, girl.
So cradle your head in your hands
And breathe... just breathe,
Oh breathe, just breathe

May he turn 21 on the base at Fort Bliss
"Just today" he said down to the flask in his fist,
"Ain't been sober, since maybe October of last year."
Here in town you can tell he's been down for a while,
But, my God, it's so beautiful when the boy smiles,
Wanna hold him. Maybe I'll just sing about it.

Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable,
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table.
No one can find the rewind button, boys,
So cradle your head in your hands,
And breathe... just breathe,
Oh breathe, just breathe

There's a light at each end of this tunnel,
You shout 'cause you're just as far in as you'll ever be out
And these mistakes you've made, you'll just make them again
If you only try turning around.

2 AM and I'm still awake, writing a song
If I get it all down on paper, it's no longer inside of me,
Threatening the life it belongs to
And I feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd
Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud
And I know that you'll use them, however you want to

But you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable,
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button now
Sing it if you understand.
and breathe, just breathe
woah breathe, just breathe,
Oh breathe, just breathe,
Oh breathe, just breathe.

Work

2006-07-15T15:02:00.000+08:00

Work is getting outta hand now. A lot of processes need to be looked at, but I just don't have the time to squeeze in every minute details, and the big boss is already harping on the issues and deliberating it via email, phone, memos, and phone, phone, and meeting, and email etc.. Streessful.

But funny, I have not been staying back late these days, though I have gazillion of things at the back of my head to look at. I suppose I have been procrastinating, and giving excuse to myself that I need to rest and therefore just putting off the things that should have been done long ago.

Ah well, that's my mistake, I have decided to stay back next week, at least if I cannot do all pending items, I could well check some 'to do list' that satisfy myself psychologically, than doing nothing and lament about it day and night...

Alrightie.. Now I just have to go back to my room, continue my reading, and relax.. after all, it's Saturday, no point thinking about pressure at work when I don't have intention to even go back to office to work ;-)

Bye now bloggies, see ya!

New Home

2006-07-15T14:24:00.000+08:00

I have been wanting to create another blog spot for long, not that I don't like Friendster's space, but there's limitation. Though I do agree that sometimes limitation is good, sometimes for breakthrough, we just need to change.

So Voila! Here you go, another look, new beginning, new hope, new entries, new everything :) Not that this blog space don't have limitation, but at least not so rigid to confine to only 50 pics per month. For photo maniac like me, of course I choose to change-la! =)

Ah well, just a begining, now listening to Keane's Everybody's changing. Nice song, also commemorate to my change now..

Bye for now.. will be back soon...